Tips for seniors to keep healthly and precautions

Don't take sleep disruption lightly. It can be caused by an improper dose of medication, an illness, or a psychological problem. Talk about it with your loved one's doctor.

Many drugs, including Halcyon and even the antidepressants that are supposed to make her life better, can cause terrifying nightmares.

If Grandma has trouble sleeping (and is not bedridden), encourage her to spend as little "awake time" as possible in bed. Reading, watching TV, and so forth, should be done in a favorite chair, while bed is for sleep only. Going to sleep and waking up at about the same time each day will also help train her body for better sleep overall.

Seniors should avoid oversleeping in the morning. It leads to having trouble falling asleep later, and the cycle of insomnia begins.

If Dad can't fall asleep within fifteen minutes of getting into bed, suggest he get up for a while and do something calming, and then try again later.

If your father wakes with night terrors, be reassuring. Show him that there's no danger nearby but avoid arguing. If he insists that something (or someone) woke him, let him know that whatever the trouble was, it's gone now.

People of any age who have difficulty sleeping should avoid exercise in the late afternoon and evening. Try morning walks instead.

Avoid caffeine not just in the evening but at any time of day. Aside from coffee, tea, and cola, look out for caffeine in chocolate, non-cola soft drinks, and some pain relievers. And while decaffeinated coffee has less caffeine than regular, it's not caffeine-free.

Alcohol can make your senior drowsy at first, but it hurts healthy sleep in the long run by disturbing the sleep cycle, making sleep less restful, and making him more likely to wake up during the night.

Maintain a sleep diary to note sleep patterns. The doctor will find this information useful if you need to consult with her, and you might discover patterns you weren't aware of: Is sleeping a problem the night before the family comes to visit? Is this about anxiety or excitement? Get a free sleep diary from the National Sleep Foundation by calling 1-202-347-3471.

If there are serious issues that require discussion, don't bring these up right before bedtime. Avoid arguments.

Some people swear by a teaspoon of honey in a cup of hot water before bedtime. Others go for warm milk with a little cinnamon. But if liquids are a problem before bed, find a different solution. A foot bath or massage right before bed can help.

Get dark-lined (blackout) shades for people who don't sleep well, and block out disturbing noise with a fan or a white noise machine. Some models have a choice of sounds that mimic ocean waves, the patter of raindrops, and other soothing sounds.

Aromatherapy using lavender candles and potpourri can be very relaxing. Try a couple drops of lavender oil in a bath or on the corner of your senior's pillow. You can even buy a microwavable teddy bear filled with potpourri that stays warm and aromatic for hours after a short "nap" in the microwave. These come in two sizes from ThermiPaq. Visit their website at thermipaq.com, call them at 1-800-800-5728, or write to them at ThermiPaq, Thermionics Cor-poration, 3501 South Sixth Street, Springfield, IL 62703. Also check out their line of other pain relief and relaxation products.

Change the linens often. Everyone enjoys fresh sheets. You can even buy lavender water to put in the wash! It's sold in a lot of home stores and catalogs these days.

Unpleasant odors can interfere with sleep. Use potpourri and make sure the air in the room has a chance to circulate. When Mom's out of the room for a while, open the windows or light a scented candle.

Create a sleep ritual before bedtime and follow this every evening. If you live far away, you can still call at bedtime to wish your parents sweet dreams.

Cotton pajamas and sheets are less irritating than synthetics.

Restless leg syndrome is a condition in which one leg or both legs experience nervous sensations that cause excessive movement. It's a fairly common condition that can often be treated with medication, iron supplements, and exercise. Is this what's keeping your loved one awake? Find out more online and talk to your doctor.

Does Dad's snoring rock the house? Is Grandma really sleepy in the morning and drowsy during the day? They may have sleep apnea, a disorder in which the person stops breathing at points during sleep. Consistent loud snoring and morning and daytime sleepiness are some of the warning signs. Men, people who are over forty, and people who are overweight are all at higher risk, but anyone can have it, and it's more common than diabetes. Sleep apnea can lead to insomnia, high blood pressure, weight gain, headaches, memory problems, excessive drowsiness, depression, impotence-the list goes on. The good news is that it can be treated, so talk to the doctor or contact the American Sleep Apnea Association (1-202-293- 3650 or sleepapnea.org).

Make sure the mattress your father sleeps on is comfortable and right for him. Soft beds are nice, but maybe he needs more support. It's easier to rise from a firm mattress.

Some people are just not morning people. If getting your parent up every morning is a problem and you already have enough to do at that hour, let her stay in bed until midmorning, if she likes, and get her up after the family has gone off to work and school.

While it may be tempting to take naps, they should be avoided if they interfere with getting a good night's sleep.

Arrange calming activities before bedtime; this is a time for reading, soft music, and soothing conversation. Have your loved one spend some time in pajamas before settling in to sleep.

Saying prayers together before bedtime can be a wonderful ritual.

Maybe Mom can't sleep because she has issues she can't talk about. Try to discuss this with her, or suggest she discuss the problem with another member of the family or a professional.

Remind your senior to go to the bathroom before going to sleep. If he gets up often at night to go to the bathroom, suggest that he doesn't drink any liquids for three or four hours before bedtime. On the other hand, don't skimp too much on fluids because you want to cut down on bathroom visits. Seniors often become dehydrated, which leads to painful (but common) urinary tract infections.

Learn sleep techniques and teach them to your senior:

Listen to your own breath and count breaths. Get comfortable, close your eyes, and begin breathing slowly but normally, then count each exhalation, either starting at one or counting back from one hundred.

Practice progressive muscle relaxation by tensing and relaxing one limb at a time. Make a fist and clench your right arm, while keeping the left relaxed; then relax the right arm. Repeat with the left arm, then each leg.

Use visualization techniques to picture yourself in a perfect, relaxing place, such as a quiet beach or lakeside.

Try a tape or CD that will guide you through a relaxation exercise or visualization. We like Total Relaxation, by John Harvey, but there are many available. You can even make your own.

Make up for lost sleep as soon as possible.

A baby monitor will alert you to any nighttime problems your parent may be having, and he will feel secure knowing that if he calls in the middle of the night, you will hear him. Show him how the monitor works.

If it's the bed that's keeping your father awake, consider getting a hospital bed. Medicare will pay for it if his doctor recommends it.

A foam "egg crate" mattress will help prevent bedsores and can be purchased from any medical supply house.

Rotate a new mattress once a month the first year and every sea-son(four times a year) after that. A mattress should be replaced every eight to ten years.

If they sleep in the same bed but Mom needs a firm mattress and Dad prefers something softer, consider getting two single beds and moving them next to each other. You can use king- or queen-sized bedding, so it looks like one bed. This allows many couples to feel comfortable without giving up intimacy.

A clock with brightly illuminated numbers can keep someone awake. Use the dimmer on the clock if it has one, turn the clock to the wall, or get a new clock.

Some people have trouble sleeping because their biological clocks are waking them at weird times. To "reset" Dad's biological clock, have him get up in the morning at the time he's like to awaken each day and spend about ten minutes facing the sun.

If your mother grinds her teeth at night-a common condition called bruxism-talk to the dentist. Mom might need a mouth guard.

Keep familiar, favorite photos at the bedside to calm Mom in case she wakes up confused about where she is. If she travels or has to spend some time in the hospital, keep these same items at her bed-side there for continuity.

Exercise

Nowhere is the saying "use it or lose it" more meaningful than among seniors. Aside from its cardiovascular benefits, exercise combats depression and osteoporosis, reduces the risk of falling, cuts down on healing time when there are injuries and illnesses, and generally improves lifestyle. Encourage your grandmother to stick to a routine.

Ask your senior to keep an exercise log and consult it often. Compliment his progress and celebrate breakthroughs.

Yoga is a great form of gentle exercise that improves the immune system and promotes well being, among many other benefits. Weight training, Tai Chi, swimming, and low-impact aerobics are also generally beneficial to seniors.

Make your own exercise video for your mother. She might hate the idea of staring at a nubile twenty-something while she does her stretching exercises, but what if, instead, she had an image of you or her granddaughter guiding her through the routine? If you own a video camera, don't pass up this opportunity to make each day more special for her.

Set up an area of your senior's home where he can exercise safely. Make it special: get an attractive exercise mat and maybe even hang up an inspirational poster. Get him colorful workout wear or a funny T-shirt ("Over the hill? What hill?" ).

If you can't go yourself, hire a reliable teen to take your parent for a walk. The outing might be less awkward if you give it a purpose, like a daily trip to the store for bagels and a newspaper.

Gardening, housecleaning, and shopping can be considered exercise. Redefine the word exercise as needed.

Things change. From time to time, review your loved one's exercise routine to make sure it's still appropriate.

Encourage deep breathing. Most people forget to breathe when they exercise.

Check with a doctor or physical therapist before your loved one embarks on any exercise routine.

If your grandfather isn't motivated to exercise, take him to a ball game to remind him of what it was like to have the wind blow through his hair (when he had hair). Walking to your seats is enough to get the body moving, and the fresh air will do wonders for him.

Bring your senior to a physical therapist for advice and general guidance. If you can get Dad's doctor to recommend the visit, insurance will pay for it. If not, it'll be a worthy expense, given the possible benefits.

All exercise routines, even walking, should start and end with a period of stretching. A stretch needs to be held for at least five seconds to be effective.

If your father refuses to exercise, try to get him to at least work on one of the important muscle groups: arms, legs, shoulders, or back.

Exercising to music is always more fun, especially if the music is your favorite. Make your loved one a special exercise tape of his favorite tunes.

If your senior totally resists the idea of exercise, don't try to bully her into it. Request a copy of the free booklet Pep Up Your Life: A Fitness Book for Seniors from AARP by calling 1-800-424-3410.

The mall opens before the stores do, and in many areas, people have discovered that they're a great place to walk. Aisles are nice and wide, and it's temperature controlled year-round. It's also a great way to meet people. Make sure security has arrived on duty by the time your senior gets there.

Exercise reduces stress. That's probably something you both need. Do it together.

Consider a professional personal trainer. Even if it's too expensive to have one regularly, a couple sessions will get your senior started on the right track and allow her to develop an appropriate routine.

It's a good idea for someone else to be around when your senior exercises, just in case there are problems. If you or a family member can't be there, this is a potential job for a responsible teen.

An hour of brisk walking four times a week can drastically improve the quality of life for a senior-or anyone else, for that matter.

Buy Mom a pedometer so she can measure her distance when she walks.

Start a senior exercise class in your dad's neighborhood. A small group can pool their resources and hire a teacher just for them, at their convenience. If no one has a basement big enough, ask restaurant owners whether their private rooms, which are rarely used during the daytime, can be made available. Or perhaps the local school can let them use part of the gym when it's not being used.

Walking is still the best exercise there is. Learn to enjoy walking slowly with your loved one.

Yoga classes can be beneficial to both you and your loved one. Consider taking classes together.

If your parent hates the idea of walking, ask him to help you by running certain errands for you ("Dad, could you be a doll and return this to the library for me?" ).

Swimming is often an option for seniors who have lost mobility. Also, water exercise classes are available at many swimming facilities.

Dancing: it's good exercise, it's a great social activity, the music can be therapeutic, and it's a wonderful way to meet people. Find out what classes are available locally, and don't ignore those classes that are aimed at kids. Instructors at those classes might be willing to start offering adult classes if enough students can be gathered. Plant the idea-swing your partner!

Look into special senior exercise programs in the neighborhood. Visit the classes on your own before you suggest your parent joins. There are some good ones out there, but some can be depressing to those who are fairly vital.

Squeezing balls of clay is good exercise for arthritic hands, as are therapeutic squeeze balls made just for that purpose. They're available at most drugstores.

Seniors have found that weight lifting using relatively light weights strengthens the body, helps bone density, increases flexibility, and reassures them of their abilities.

Always check with a doctor before your loved one embarks on any exercise program.

Complete Guide to Health Services for Seniors: What Your Family Needs to Know About Medicare, Assisted Living, Nursing Homes, Home Care, Adult Day Care by Trudy Lieberman. Practical advice and realistic steps to take distinguish this guide published under the auspices of the nation's foremost consumers' advice service. The guide explains all the system's elements in detail, alerts the reader to potential problems, tells where to get additional information and support, and offers some helpful worksheets and cost estimates. Senior Health-care jargon gets explained, and seniors are advised to prepare both a health-care proxy and a living will.

Are Your Parents Driving You Crazy? How to Resolve the Most Common Dilemmas with Aging Parents by Joseph A. Ilardo, Carole R. Rothman. Clinical social worker Joseph Ilardo and clinical psychologist Rothman co-direct the Center for Adult Children of the Elderly and the Center for Caregiver Studies in Scarsdale, NY. In Are Your Parents Driving You Crazy?, they present a problem-solving model that anyone can use with aging parents. The groundwork of the model is immediately followed by analyses of 25 common dilemmas (e.g., how to deal with an elderly parent who insists on driving or who refuses to take medication) with possible outcomes. After each scenario, the authors pose six questions: Does everyone agree that the problem exists? How urgent is the problem? What's behind the behavior? What is hooking the adult child? Who must be included in the discussions? And, finally, what is the expected goal or final outcome? Similar in scope to Grace Lebow and Barbara Kane's Coping with Your Difficult Older Parent (Avon, 1999), this is an excellent choice for parents, adult children, caretakers, and other health professionals